Index: TSN Phoenix
As of 1417-2237, I was reassigned to the Phoenix. After a five month tenure at tactical aboard the flagship, I was finally able to take a permanent post at the helm so I’m no longer eyeing Lt. Quinn’s post with gaze unbecoming an officer. So I packed my things up and shipped off to my new bunk. The Raven had been my home since I joined the 4th Light Division. Yet in my off-duty socialization, the Phoenix had become a lot like a family to me.
Even then, fitting in off duty and filling in on a ship are different matters entirely. There are some days I’m not quite sure if I fit in on the Phoenix. Unless given an illegal order, it is my duty to obey my commanding officer to the best of my ability. I also know that the Phoenix can be a controversial ship. Despite that, it gets the job done. And I don’t mean that from the stand point that everyone always thinks their ship and crew is hot stuff. They all are in their own individual ways. The way the vessels themselves are designed and outfitted, the commanding officers, right down to how the individual officers themselves execute their respective duties. I approach my responsibilities differently than other pilots in the division. I’m probably more similar in terms of my tenure as a weapons officer to others, but that’s because there is not an awful lot of flexibility there outside of the gunnery scopes, knowledge of enemy hull design, and reaction times. In engineering I feel like I run the ship more aggressively than others, but that could just be because I’m not standing over their shoulders. I can’t see the heat indicators from another station unless some juncture ruptures and we have reduced system capacity. I know I approach science in the school of scan deep rather than scan broad in most circumstances, and while I will always be a student of Slate’s school of comms I won’t ever be her peer…
I suppose what I mean to say is that the ships are made special by the ones who fly them. That’s our family. We may be better at some things than others. We are certainly worse at certain tasks or roles than others. But our ship mates and the division are our family. We shouldn’t hate our family. We shouldn’t tear our family down. I’m sure on some level we can be too harsh even if well intentioned, and I know I’ve crossed that line before. I’m sure I will again. But I shouldn’t, because anyone who requests reassignment from the division or just desk duty is as much a hole when we ship out as someone who is KIA. I want to be better. Not just technically better, but better all around. I’m not really sure everything that means… Perhaps I was too hard on Cmdr. Tuor today. Perhaps I was too hard on Lt. Cdr. Zelreich today. Maybe I should cut everyone a break…. even if the deck officer in CIC decides that next week is a good time for another bloody simulated escort mission.